“Black Don’t Crack” Almost Kept Me From Getting Fillers

When American Beauty Star first came out, I thought, Damn, I look so tired. When you see yourself from the outdoors, you begin to look at yourself objectively. Everyone can recognize what that’s like because we are all selfie-obsessed. Being on TV changed into searching in a reflection, and I became very self-acutely aware of my eyes. I asked my buddy, a former beauty director, what I ought to do. “Do you understand of a top-notch eye cream to cast off this hollowness, puffiness, or something I have?” I requested her. And she stated, “Listen, I don’t recognize an eye-fixed cream. However, I recognize an exquisite dermatologist, and her name is Dr. Dendy.”

I met dermatologist Dendy Engelman, MD, in New York City, and we immediately hit it off. I suppose having an awesome relationship with your dermatologist, who recognizes your wishes and aesthetics, is crucial. Dr. Dendy is like the Michael Jordan of dermatology. Doing what I do at the level I am, I should visit all and sundry — but I might only see her. First, I got micro-needling, which gives your pores and skin a piece of trauma, so it repairs itself, making it much more dense and younger. Then, after that, she advised me about fillers. There are so many special filler forms, and so much has evolved because I first heard of it in the past due to the ’90s. I handiest notion of it to be one component, which made me look tight and plastic. But nowadays, there are many conservative ways to use those “helpers,” as I like to name them. Dr. Dendy told me I ought to attempt fillers underneath my eyes; it’s a modern-day renovation and no longer as taboo as we think it is.

I had no reservations as a man —that is the last issue that crossed my mind. These things have truly no gender. I’m a splendor man and also a strong woman who impacts actual alternate all around the world. One component that I have always learned from girls like Beyoncé and Serena is that they in no way allowed people to put them right into a field. I won’t let anybody inform me that I can’t do something. It’s going to affect my situation.

However, I was anxious because there are different cultural limitations to accepting something like filler. People of shade believe it isn’t always for us and are reluctant to buy something injectable or plastic. We come from the belief that “Black don’t crack.” Mind you, [our skin] sags, and we get hyperpigmentation, and we have certain matters that manifest to our complexion, pores, and skin that don’t show up to different demographics.

We’ve grown up with many toxic masculinity and stereotypes of machismo within the Spanish and Black network, so I’m coming from a place some may name rebellion or enlightenment — depending on who you ask. But I’m okay in my pores and skin, so it would not depend on who thinks what, as long as it’s operating. This is the golden age of inclusivity and diversity, and I’m a part of the splendor community that influences how we build on ourselves daily.

After being given the filler, I left Dr. Dendy’s workplace feeling like Superman. You couldn’t tell me shit that week. Everyone — regardless of where you’re from, from age 8 to 88 —all have insecurities. We all have something that needs to be adjusted, corrected, or revised. When that happens, it feels correct and moves the needle emotionally—it changes our functioning. I do not run again to Dr. Dendy regularly. I’m no longer in a place in which I’m filling things to be the closing perfectionist — that’s where we go a line. So many people are getting something like this to make themselves sense better, approximately something emotional. They visit a dermatologist and say, “Fill me up,” after they should be going to a therapist. I turned okay with myself emotionally before I did it. This is precisely for permitting yourself to be the sweet version of yourself, and that’s where it has to begin and prevent.

I’m sure in 5 years, there’s going to be something new. It will likely be a laser that you merely look into, and bing, bing, bing, just like the Jetsons, you are performed. Who knows? But as of where we are now, I am very much okay with developing older and only going in for an annual checkup. And while someone tells me I appear desirable, I say, “Thanks, I’ve had a little love.”